Final Sermon

Final Sermon

Temple Beth Jacob

June 21, 2019

Rabbi Larry Freedman

This is a sermon I have not been looking forward to writing.  It is the last big sermon I will write for you and it ends this portion of my rabbinic career.  Eleven years is not terribly long in the tenure of rabbis but it is a fair amount of time.  A lot of the children here don’t know any other rabbi.  A lot of the adults, don’t either.  I’ve been present at baby namings and funerals, so many b’nai mitzvah, and I have even had the greatest joy for a rabbi, officiating at weddings of former students.  I’ve taught some of you some things, learned a lot from a lot of you, challenged you greatly, been right often, been wrong often, too, although depending on who you ask one could score me as wrong more often.  You know who you are members of Torah study.

I’m proud of my work here.  I’m proud of the new ideas and proud of adding some oomph to old traditions.  Sure a few things have fallen aside since I first came.  Some of you may still not agree with swapping out tallit making in place of wimple making.  That was a hard thing to convince you of.

Show of hands.  Who knows what a wimple is?  And a tallit?  Yup.  I was right.

On the ritual side, I’m proud of our changes, bringing in two new prayer books and focusing on other traditions in addition to or sometimes in place of just liturgy.  I hope I’ve advanced the notion of what being religious means.  I hope it can mean attention to Jewish living beyond “Orthodox” which includes an assortment of rituals and customs and new traditions.  We have 80 come out for Sukkot and we had 40 for our Tikun Leil Shavuot.  You really missed a good one, by the way.  That evening deserves more attention.  A Rosh Hashana hike and community seder.  A long time ago we blessed the sun, I managed to get one trip to Israel and we praised Yoda and Yochanan ben Zakai the same evening.  Yes it is rituals, yes it is prayer and yes it is a bunch more creative stuff.  I’ve tried to bring some of that in so that you can without hesitation consider yourself religious.  More work, always more work is needed.

On the ethical side, I hope you’ve gotten the message that your obligation to Torah is the path that will make the world a better place and make yourself a better person.  I feel like I’ve said that a few times over the years.  Don’t worry about the other guy.  Don’t worry that “society” isn’t ready.  You are the other guy.  You are society.  You are the impediment to a better world or the catalyst for a better world.  You determine if you will be better person.  Don’t worry about anyone else because that is just an excuse to keep you from making the world a better place and yourself a better person.

And of course we have moved to the notion of partnership and this past year the Board of Trustees has read Relational Judaism.  Both of these initiatives are to remember that you are not members who pay for a service but partners in an ongoing process of maintaining a Jewish presence here in the Hudson Valley and developing deeper meaning and value of that presence in the lives of our people.  It is a difficult task to express that but it is the path we are on.

I’m proud of my style.  I’m maybe too direct, maybe too voluble, maybe I goof around too much but on the other hand, I’m very direct because I believe you deserve the respect of a direct answer.  My answers are too long because I think adults deserve nuance and complexity.  I try to be funny because Judaism should not be a dour experience but when we talk about personal things, I am all in with no distractions.  I have always taken you and your concerns very seriously. 

What I have not done is taken myself too seriously.  Rabbis can become self-absorbed and arrogant.  I’m sure that’s a shock to you.  It is what can happen when you are in the front of the room with all eyes on you.  It is what can happen when you begin to believe not just that you are helpful but that you and only you have the qualities to be helpful.  I know myself and I know I can succumb to that which is why I’m not great with accepting compliments.  I do love the pat on the back, the word of appreciation or expressions of gratitude.  It lets me know I’m on the right track, that my work is effective.  It’s good to get an attaboy every now and then as feedback.  More than that is hard to take.  My therapist couldn’t shake that out of me, my wife can’t shake that out of me, you won’t succeed either.  And why should you?  We all have quirks.  Human beings are quirky.  Thank you for accepting me as I am, quirks and all.  Thank you for your willingness to never, ever get me a birthday cake.

I am pleased and proud to have served as your rabbi in this corner of the Jewish world for 11 years.  All I’ve ever wanted to do is serve the Jewish people in the trenches.  I never wanted to write books, I’m not on national committees.  I just wanted to do the work.  It is all about the work, all about helping Jews and Jewish families deepen their connection to our heritage.  It is all about helping you, guiding you, teaching you.  It is not about me and never should be.  If you truly want to express your thanks, let me ask for this.  Think of something specifically I was able to do for you or for the congregation as a whole that helped connect you even a little closer to the Jewish people and our heritage.  Let me know that.  Did my efforts work for you?  Tell me specifically how I moved you, how my work connected you to Torah and the Jewish people just a little bit more.  Truly that will be the sweetest feedback and thanks of all.

What am I doing now?

I am returning to Pittsburgh, to a place that feels like home, to a whole lot of friends with whom we raised our children, to run a 180 student religious school.  Twenty teachers, assistant director, cantorial soloist attached as well.  Big job.  It is called JJEP, joint Jewish educational program.  It is a collaboration between a Rodef Shalom, Reform, and Beth Shalom, Conservative.  Right now it is a 5 year old experiment that runs K-7.  They have great hope to increase post-B’nai Mitzvah offerings and there is lots of talk about what to do about high school education.  Should it be synagogue based?  Should it be JCC based?  I’m excited for these conversations.

It is true that I do not as of now have pulpit responsibilities.  If you include my student days this fall will be the first time in 30 years that I will sit next to Deborah for Rosh Hashana.  Will I miss being in charge and up front?  Yes.  Will I miss being in charge and up front?  No.  Maybe next year I’ll take on some youth services leadership and return to telling the story of Jonah with calls to, “Go to Nineveh.”  But for now, there’s enough to do to get oriented with my main job.  I’m good.

One thing, though.  Now, I know what you mean, truly, and I don’t let too many things get to me but it is wearing a little thin when people offer, with sad faces, their supportive sorrow that I won’t be a rabbi anymore.  It’s a little like saying to a dentist that you are sorry they never became a real doctor.  Would you say to a Rosh Yeshiva in Riverdale that he’s not a real rabbi?  But feel no sorrow.  No sad faces.  To me, I have a congregation of 180 students and 360 parents.  You don’t think I’m bringing all my pastoral skills to that?  Unlike the pulpit where you don’t see many people but two or three times a year, I will have over 500 people all of whom see themselves as very concerned stake holders and they all show up every single week.  Oy.

It is time for some thank you’s which will be wholly inadequate.  When we arrived here, I was coming off a disastrous two years at a giant synagogue.  My head was reeling but you took a chance on me and for that I will be forever grateful to each and everyone one of you.  My thanks to all the presidents and members of the executive committee, in particular our current officers and board to whom I handed a monumental headache.  A great thank you to all the members of the boards of trustees who have listened to me, ignored me or some combination of both but always with respect and courtesy.  More important than anything we do, more important than any idea we accept or reject, more important than all of it is that we’ve always treated each other respectfully and with trust.  That is how you keep a congregation strong.  When we have failed in that goal, we have been on rocky shores.  Differences of opinions are fine.  Passionate conversation is great because, certainly because, we are all committed to the Jewish people staying strong here along the shores of the Hudson.  When that becomes our only goal, when we stay mission focused and stay away from gossip and drama, we do very well.  We moved in to a different building with a whole other congregation and JCC and it has worked out very well and the future looks even better.  How did this happen?  We stayed mission focused and we stayed away from gossip and drama.  We built trust and we built a busy, vibrant home for us all.

Thank you to all the custodians who help keep this place running and cleaned up after me.  I have an especially heartfelt thanks to Maryjean Dominick who does so much for so many and has been, in many ways, a partner to me helping to keep things together.  Great appreciation, thanks and so much more for my friendship and professional partnership with Stefanie Kostenblatt.  I regret that we only just began to imagine what this place can be.  So much appreciation for my musical partnerships with Jim Blanton and over years, Cantor Wunch, Cantor Anna, Amy Goldstein, Chris Mason and Cantor Hirschenfang.  Of course, George Levy and Steve Pearl and  everyone who has stepped in to sing.

My great appreciation to Federation and all they do for our community and to our interfaith community who come together infrequently but with great purpose and support and respect.  And to my partners across the aisle, Rabbis Edelman and Cella and, of course, Philip Weintraub without whom Kol Yisrael could not have happened.

And thanks to Shari Franco and all the teachers who work very hard to inspire our next generation.

Shelach lecha is this week’s parasha.  It tells the story of the 12 spies who go to reconnoiter the Land of Israel.  They all see how great it is but when they see some of the inhabitants, they become afraid and think they can’t do it.  Well, ten of them think they can’t do it but two encourage them to be brave and have confidence.  But it wasn’t to be.  As I leave and a new rabbi comes forward remember to be pragmatic, be realistic as you reconnoiter your context here in the Hudson Valley but be brave going forward.  Don’t imagine you cannot.  Look clearly at your resources and then dream big.  As always, more people need to step up and lend a hand.  We really need all 12 spies being supportive, not just two, so volunteer even if it is for just a small project.

Use the time with your new rabbi to reconnoiter yourselves, to understand who you are, what you want, where the value is in this community.  Dig into values of our heritage and create novel ways to live them out.  Be brave as you always have been, and this place will be here for many more generations.  Don’t be negative.  Don’t be negative about each other or ideas or initiatives.  Be positive and forward looking.  Don’t look around for someone to do something.  You do something. 

Be brave.  Be like the two brave spies, not like the doubting ten.  Be brave and thoughtful and helpful and upbeat and you will do very well for a very long time to come.

Thank you for all you have done for me and my family.  Thank you all.  Chazak v’ematz.  Be strong and courageous.  Let me end not with my voice but your voice because my voice, while appreciated, is never as important as your voice which is crucial.  When we end a book of the Torah, a chapter in our story, I say this and then you repeat.  As you end this chapter in the story of Temple Beth Jacob, let us say:  Be strong, be strong and we will be strengthened.  Repeat after me.  Chazak chazak v’nitchazek.